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Monday, February 10, 2014

3:42AM - There's a New Gender Neutral Bathroom Locator and Database Up and Running! Check it Out!

Hey everyone! My friend Teagan just launched "REFUGE Restrooms", a new applicatiom/database for phone and computer use that stores information on gendeer neutral restrooms, as well aas lcates them and allows users to input information on new gender neutral bathrooms that they know about. For years Safe2Pee was the go-to website to find the nearest gender neutral bathrooms but it appears that site has been all but abandoned. As members of this community know, no fight for human rights can happen without fighting forthe right to life's most basics and that the right to go to the bathroom wthout fer of harassment is one of those basics.

Please help spread the word about this awesome new resource to whoever you know who can use it, a well as any organization who's part of the fight for the rights of TGIQ folks around the world.

To check out Refuge Restrooms please go to www.refugerestrooms.org

(1 scream | stare at me)

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

10:36AM - My new FTM YOUTUBE Channel!


im ryan, and im ftm! yah

i just wanted to post about my new youtube channel, where im trying to set up a place for people to talk about ftm everyday issues. Ive set up a few videos already and am open to ideas to make new videos. one of the more important reasons for doing this was because i felt that the lgbt community has a way of excluding queer people of color, and being hispanic myself, i identify with this feeling. i havent seen much out there based on these issues and thought maybe this could be a place for some of that to be spoken about.

well heres the channel check it out!


(stare at me)

Thursday, January 21, 2010

12:01PM - Perfect Bathroom Trip : The SONG lol!

haha, so I'm one of those people who always use the paper towels to open the door. This funny song is amazing! check it out!

Perfect Bathroom Trip Song

Email this sound bite to a friend Download this sound bite Facebook Twitter

(stare at me)

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

12:48PM - Research: Queer Community and Eating Disorders

Hello everyone!

This is the first post that I am making to this community, and it is unfortunate that it is not going to be a lovely introductory post. That will happen soon though! I really hope that this is okay to do, and I apologize so much if it is not.

My friend is currently conducting research on the transgender community in relation to eating disorders. She just so happens to know multiple trans-identified people who have suffered with eating disorders and severe body image issues (somewhat understandable). She is hoping that this research will develop into something beneficial to the community, and she asked me to help her out. Her sample size of personal friends is not enough, basically.

Anyway, this is a one page- ten question survey. It is very short and should only take a second. I am hoping to crosspost this to a few places in order to get her research started. I wouldn't do it if I did not truly feel like it was a useful and worthwhile time-investment.


That is the link to the survey. I apologize, again, if this is not acceptable for this board.
Please be willing to help if it is. Thank you so much.


PS: Apologies for those who see this multiple times. I wanted to send it out to various trans and genderqueer related groups! :]

(stare at me)

Saturday, March 28, 2009

8:54PM - Account of anti-transgender harassment by Stony Brook campus cops on the way to TDOR last semester

Hello all, this is Cynthya BrianKate from Long Island. I'm finally coming forward with this account of being harassed by Stony
Brook University security on the way to November's campus TDOR. (Transgender Day Of Remembrance) for the “crime” of using a bathroom more in keeping with my gender. I’ve held off til now for two reasons, one because I have felt too damned humiliated by the incident and two because I was trying to work in-house with Stony Brook to make sure the issue was fully redressed
and made sure never to happen again. As I am beyond dissatisfied
with their lack of action over three months and change, here goes,
first the single paragraph version and the full letter I have
shopped around the college to give more detail.Read more...Collapse )

Current mood: determined

(1 scream | stare at me)

Thursday, January 22, 2009

1:13PM - Q about books

Anyone know of a book about Transgender people that is written for an academic audience or in an academic way? I'm looking for a book which utilizes qualitative methods (interviews, ethnography, direct or covert observation, participant observation, content or historical analysis, etc.) and in which the author discusses their role as a researcher and how it may have effected their research. Right now I am thinking about using Leslie Feinberg's "Transgender Warriors" but it doesn't seem like it would be easy to write a book review on it. Oh I am looking for a book I can write a book review on for a Qualitative Methods class I am in in Grad school. I am in Sociology if that helps too. The book doesn't necessarily have to be a Sociology type book but it does have to be qualitative.  I know this is incredibly specific but it doesn't hurt to ask. Thanks everyone!
x-posted like mad. 

(11 screams | stare at me)

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

9:15PM - Hey :)

Hey everyone,

A very happy new year to you all!

My name is Imogen, I live in Cambridge UK. I was born female and am happy with my body but consider my self Gender Queer. I came out as gay at 14 (nearly wrote 144!!) and have been with my partner for a number of years now.

I am a photography student in Cambridge and I am just about to go into the final term of my 3rd year. I have covered quite a few topics over the last three years including self harm, mental health, eating disorders and physical disability. You can see some of my work here: Flickr or my own web site here: Indigo Clouds Photography

This term I want to do a project surrounding 'Gender Queer' and 'Transsexuality'. So I am looking for people who might want to be involved in the project. I will be hoping to photograph a few aspects of the topic including things like: following someone through aspects of their transition, photographing people with their families, following people to Dr's appointments, visiting and photographing both home & work, doing some studio shots (including partners, with/with out make up, in underwear etc) .. For helping me out you would get a copy of your images on a disk, a copy of your favorite 5 printed up to A2 and many many thank yous from me!

Having dealt with subjects that are often unknown to family members or friends I am more than happy for people to remain anonymous. As you can see from my self harm images most participants don't have their face in the images. I would like for some of those who wish to take part to be able to have their face in the images, purely due to the nature of the project.

I don't have any money to pay those who take part but I could help with travel costs if people are on a low income and I am more than happy to provide accommodation in the form of the sofa in my front room!

Please feel free to contact me with questions, anything you might like to know. Also, feel free to pass this post onto friends who might not see it on LJ or even to other communities. I would also like people to take part in a survey that will be part of the final project so if you would like to receive that you can get in touch.

Finally, during previous projects people have contacted me suggesting that aspects of the project might be highlighting the 'wrong' parts of the issues. I warmly welcome this contact and can only understand the subject to a point with out this source of information.

My contact details:

E mail - Imogen.Jo@Gmail.com
Mobile - 0754 99 33 030
LJ - New_Kinda_Freak

Thank you for reading,
Kind Regards,

Imogen May

Current mood: artistic

(stare at me)

Sunday, December 14, 2008


Hey everyone,
I am having a problem with my employer. Management told me that I have to wear a name badge that has my legal name on it (although other employees wear nicknames or shortened names on their badges) and that I must not use the single-stall, locking men's restroom unless I have legal documentation of sex change. I referred them to the Title 5 amendment in Maine law that prohibits discrimination against people because of gender identity.

I'm having a bit of trouble finding out how this law can or has been interpreted, especially with regards to name usage and bathroom access. The only clarifying language I find in the statutes referring to Title 5 use the word "disability," which doesn't seem appropriate for the situation.

Maine law is found here: http://maine.gov/portal/government/law.html
A search for "sexual orientation" will turn up Title 5 and definitions, and a search for "gender identity" turns up an explanatory definition page (where the word disability is found, seems to be in blanket reference to title 5 but i can't tell.)

Any help I can get on this is so great. Thank you for your time. :)


(4 screams | stare at me)

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

1:30PM - Accidentally Passing

Hey everyone. I don't identify myself as a boy, but sometimes other people do.

I used to hate it. These days, I'm pretty neutral on the whole thing so long as I'm not getting threatened.

Here are some incidents I can remember right now:

-A little girl at the grocery store asked me "Are you a boy? Are you a girl?" I smiled and didn't say anything. She turned to her mom and asked "Mommy, can I be a boy?" Her mom replied "You can be anything you want, honey." After that, it seemed like her curiosity was satisfied.
-I get cruised by gay men. Sometimes they give me the sex look and then realize I'm a girl, but it's a little awkward when they don't seem to figure it out. Sometimes I get "If you were a boy..." I don't even know what to say about that one. I guess they're right, if I'm being interpreted as a boy, I don't look much like a straight one.
-A bunch of angry young guys came after me for being a "faggot", then there's the usual people that yell insults from afar because apparently I'm a gay man and they aren't okay that.
-I got ma'am/sir'ed yesterday, which is always amusing. That's when someone calls you both ma'am and sir, usually accompanied by extreme nervousness. The most embarrassing is when they're extra confused and switch pronouns back and forth.

I think it's weird that with our language you pretty much have to judge someone as male or female before they can even talk to them, or talk about them. It seems like such a problematic and arbitrary requirement.

(8 screams | stare at me)

Monday, June 16, 2008


The Gender Public Advocacy Coalition is pleased to announce the release of its 2008 GENIUS Survey in partnership with Ernst & Young. GenderPAC works to ensure that classrooms, communities and workplaces are safe for everyone to learn, grow and succeed.

The Gender Equality National Index for Universities & Schools (GENIUS), GenderPAC’s most recent effort to end discrimination and promote awareness, encourages colleges and universities to recognize the benefits of a GenderSAFE campus - supportive equitable and protective for all students. Choosing to participate in GENUIS sends a strong public statement that bullying or discriminating based on the race, sex or gender of a student, faculty, or staff member is not tolerated at your institution

Fill out the survey at: www.gpac.org/GENIUS2008survey, and make sure that we have data for as many schools as possible. Your voice will help us continue to work towards a safe and welcoming environment for every student

(stare at me)

Saturday, June 14, 2008

2:49AM - funny experience..

this has to be the funniest moment in my transition so far.

short background, i am almost 2 years on testosterone, no name change (in the process but not legal yet), no surgeries, no gender change on my ID, nothing to indicate on my ID that i am male, but i pass pretty much 100%.

i went to a concert a few months ago, and at this particular venue, they have machines where they slide your ID or driver license, and it prints your legal name on the wrist band. so i thought, oh great, my name is right there for everyone to see, i'm going to have to use the women's room..

this particular venue also for some reason has bathroom attendants.. it's new, but it's not what i'd call "nice", it's standing only... so anyway that's just kinda weird to me.. but i had to pee, and the female attendant was standing outside the women's room, i walked that direction, and she blocked my path.. she wouldn't let me in, so i showed her my wristband thinking then she would let me in... WRONG! she kept pointing at the men's room and shaking her head.. so i just shrugged at her and went into the men's.. the attendant in there didn't bat an eye at me.

i just thought that was really hilarious at the time, and i guess it doesn't matter if my legal name (still wrong) is tattooed on my forehead, people take me for male!

i hope that made at least one of you laugh :).

*edit*: my legal name is VERY OBVIOUSLY female. it didn't seem like the attendant spoke much english, or even spoke at all, she just was shaking her head at me, still.. she should have been able to tell it was a female name.. lol. not that i want to use the women's room (though sometimes at certain concerts i have to, only urinals in the men's or the one stall is taken.. sucks), i just thought i would have to in this particular case.. lol

though this seems to happen to me with professionals all of the time as well, they will see my name or ID and still call me he and sir, but sometimes not. (i know that has nothing to do with bathrooms, just a little more background)

Current mood: amused

(stare at me)

Sunday, May 11, 2008

7:05PM - Binary Sport

It's happened once again!

Friday I went to weigh-in for the World's Powerlifting Competition in Fairhaven VT. Scott Taylor (head of the American Powerlifting Association) instructed one of the Fairhaven Fitness women to weigh [us] four women in.

She went into the women's locker room with two of the other women and I followed shortly after checking in for my division. I walk in and she says to me, "This is the women's weigh-in. The men's room is just down the hall". I take a breath and say with some edge, "I am a woman". She made a VERY obvious look to my chest and apologized. Then she said that she shouldn't have done that because the very same thing had happened to her the other day!

I'd really like to say, "You've been genderfk'd!" Kinda' like Punk'd.

probably x-post'd

(stare at me)

Thursday, February 14, 2008

10:59AM - MELBOURNE:know any existing gender neutral and/or wheelchair accessible bathrooms? cross posted

hi folks please circulate through your networks





We strongly believe that everyone, regardless of gender identification, presentation or ability has the right to access safe and dignified bathroom facilities without fear of harassment, judgment or violence. Toil/Art will work to raise awareness around issues of bathroom accessibility and gender neutral facilities, map bathrooms in Melbourne, and foster a sense of community for the users of these bathrooms through creative and artistic endeavours.

Read more...Collapse )

(stare at me)

Monday, February 4, 2008

5:56PM - OMG

 I used to get it all the time
it caused me much stress.

 i would hold it so i wouldn't have to go in public

 or I would use the family/handicap single bathrooms when there was one

Now I just go to the men's room

they don't even look at each other anyway

and I pass, have for years mostly

(1 scream | stare at me)

Saturday, October 27, 2007

2:37PM - gender nuetral bathrooms...

A possible conversation between a Lowes female customer and Lowes manager....

customer: I think, but can't be sure if it is one on your employees, but they just said fuck you to me in the bathroom.

manager: what makes you think they were an employee and can you tell me what happened?

customer: I came out of the stall and the person, wearing a Lowes hat was washing their hands. I couldn't tell if they were female or male so I was starring at this person. The person turned around and asked me not to stare at them and that they had every right to be in the bathroom since she was female. I responded with, I wasn't staring. She said I was and we went back and forth on this. Finally I said, "WELL IF YOU DRESSED MORE FEMININE I WOULDN'T HAVE TO STARE AT YOU!" At that point this person said fuck you to me. I don't appreciate this behavior from this person.

manager (hopefully): well, would it not have been more appropriate not to stare at the person than that would have avoided the entire confrontation!

I really hate people and I sometimes really hate using the bathroom. It is a very innocent natural act, yet the stares get really annoying. Considering it is where I work, and the confusion usually doesn't happen with other Lowes employees I really don't want to use the men's room, although I do alot of the times when I am out in public just to avoid this situation.

Why can't woman just use the bathroom when needed. Why do they feel they need to talk, stare at themselves in the mirror, and worry about who and what others are doing in there. Really, do these people have two separate bathrooms at home - one for girls and one for boys? So what makes people so different out of the home? Why does using the bathroom need to be an adventure?

Ok, so maybe I shouldn't have said fuck you to her, but when your just minding your own business and than told to dress more feminine, well, what can I say I usually speak without thinking. Either way, I didn't get in trouble, at least not yet. I wasn't in any kind of uniform.

Added for clarity - I do not work for Lowes. I work for an company that does service work for Lowes. I have no idea whether the customer went to a manager or not - it was a possible conversation that might have or might not have happened. As for saying fuck you - it was a response to a very frustrating day being topped with this confrontation in the bathroom. By no means am I saying I was in the right for saying it.

cross posted from my own journal and genderqueer

(1 scream | stare at me)

Monday, May 28, 2007


Hi, I'm Stephen, a hopelessly scrawny young transgender boy with a history of scribbling. I went fulltime just after the holidays last year (what a fun family event that was) and have been so ever since, although I am still just a shade too young and poor and unemployed for T.

However, while this is something of an intro post, I also have an agenda. As a writer, and specifically a playwright, I've been very disappointed by the lack of transgender issues in the theatre. (Or anywhere, really.) This June, I'm participating in an event called ScriptFrenzy - you can find out more about it here. It's managed by the same guys who do NaNoWriMo, if you've heard of that. In any case, this June I'm going to be writing a play about growing up FtM.

Long story short, I need funny stories. I know growing up trans doesn't seem particularly funny at the time - I'm still in the thick of it, after all. But I often find that the language of comedy is the one that expresses pain the best. The idea of asking trans guys about their personal experiences came from an FtM friend who told me a story about a fight with his mom during which she threw a book. Not at him, just arbitrarily. It was funny and sad at the same time - funny that she'd be so immature, sad that...well, sad that she'd be so immature, or more accurately, that her son had been saddled with such an immature mother.

So! Anything that's happened to you that you're comfortable having fictionalized - be it sad, funny, ridiculous, surreal, or just plain interesting - I want to hear about it. And it may, if it works with the play, happen to the main character, whose name is Alexander. (Formerly Alexandra.)

I'd very much appreciate your input, and I'm absolutely happy with giving you any kind of credit you might want.

(This is being crossposted to a bunch of trans related comms, if there's a problem with that, please tell me.)

(6 screams | stare at me)

Sunday, April 22, 2007

9:54AM - Transgender Rights Town Meeting - University of Maryland, Baltimore County - Baltimore, MD


April 24, 2007
7:00 pm
Chemistry Building, Lecture Hall 2

One of the top 2007 legislative priorities for LGBTQ rights organizations in Maryland was adding protection for transgender Marylanders in the state's anti-discrimination laws. Despite majority support in both the House and Senate the legislation was defeated by one vote in committee.

Join us to discuss what happened in Annapolis and where we go from here. We will be joined by the bill's sponsors, Delegate Adrienne Jones and Senator Lisa Gladden. Our special guest is Julie Nemecek, the Michigan college professor who was recently fired when she came out as transgender. Additional speakers are Steve Glassman, Chairman of the Pennsylvania Human Relations Commission, and David Noble, Political Director, National Gay and Lesbian Task Force.

Refreshment and light snacks will be provided. ASL interpreter is available on request; please contact 301-587-7500. Parking is available on campus. Sponsored by UMBC Gender and Women's Studies Program.

UMBC's website.
Directions, parking information, and map of campus.

(x-posted to anywhere I think is likely to care.)

(stare at me)

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

12:39PM - Calling Baltimore!!!!!

Are you Trans? Genderqueer? SOFFAS?

Do you feel like we get no support in Baltimore? Feel like we could use some more?

This is just an informal inquiry, please respond in any way you want to... but I am after numbers here.

How many Trans/gender queer/bending folk do we have here? SOFFAS too... I want everyone's word on this.

X posted like it's my full-time job. I want to apologize to anyone seeing this a million times.

(stare at me)

Thursday, January 4, 2007

12:45PM - gender neutral bathroom directory

I thought this might be of interest to you all.

I’m working with several other genderqueer folks in san francisco to
create a nation-wide searchable gender neutral bathroom directory. At the
moment, what we have is rudimentary and only accessible through a web
browser, but we'd like to think that it offers the beginnings of a great
resource for those who may not feel comfortable with the rigid binary of
bathrooms in our society. Most of our locations are in the san francisco
bay area or portland, but we'd love to get some from around the country.
International support is coming soon!

We are also seeking feedback and more bathroom entries to build our
database. The project has only begun and there is still a lot of work
being done onto improve the scripting and layout, but you can visit and
add to the beta at http://safe2pee.org/beta/.

Those with comments, ideas, feature requests or a desire to assist with
the project may reach us at safe2pee at riseup dot net. Please re-post and distribute this message.

Thank you.

(6 screams | stare at me)

Wednesday, December 6, 2006


So this is a amazing project that was done by a guy named E.J. at his school....

Because it does envolve kinda the topic discussed within this group I felt it only appropriate for me to copy and paste the link for all those interested to see


(1 scream | stare at me)

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